Yard Impermanence
At some point in my life, I believe it was during my adult life, I decided I wanted a lilac bush. I loved the smell of lilacs and the way the blooms turned into handfuls of tiny puffs of lavender color. I didn’t grow up with a lilac bush, so maybe that’s where my desire came from?
One day, I announced to my husband that I wanted a lilac bush. I believe we were living in our first home. It was the late 1980s. The house had a nice garden. It had beautiful rhododendron bushes. They were so beautiful, in fact, that the prior owner’s children came back and took their prom pictures in front of the bushes. Still, I wanted a lilac bush. Thinking back, I certainly could have purchased one for myself. I chose to wait. At the time, my then husband had the role of “yard planner.”
We moved multiple times after living in that house. In 2005, when we owned our fifth house, my husband finally put in a lilac bush. I was thrilled. I loved to watch it bloom and see the puffs of lavender. One day I decided to cut some blooms from the bush and take them to work in a vase. By the end of the workday, I had a bunch of wilted branches. Cutting the lilac branches led to their immediate demise.
In 2015, I moved to my current home. It’s my home, no one else lives here. I can decorate it and set up the yard however I would like. In my backyard, I have two lilac bushes! They are two different breeds. One is the traditional one with big puffy purple blossoms. The other one has smaller, darker blossoms and blooms a couple weeks later than the traditional one. I also have 7 fruit trees in my backyard. These delights bring me buds, blossoms, and fruits all summer long. First the apricots, then the plums, followed by the peaches, nectarines, pears, and finally apples. There are also arches of grape vines that bring me delicious grapes at the end of every summer. All of these fruits are delicious treats that I get to watch blossom and grow from spring through the summer months.
The lilacs though, they are fleeting. As soon as they start to blossom, I know that they will soon start to wilt. While I am excited to see them, knowing my summer is about to start, I realize just as the blossoms drop, my summer will eventually fade away. These flowers mark the impermanence of our lives. They return every May just to disappear a week later. When I am feeling sad, I often think of the impermanence of my lilacs. I realize, like the lilacs, my sadness will be impermanent. But in the spring, when the lilacs show up, I am reminded of the impermanence of my happiness. I’m not saying my happiness is fleeting, but I think that when it shows up now, I would like to savor it just a bit more. The lilacs are starting to blossom this week. By next week, the traditional blossoms will be gone. I think I will try to spend a little more time outside smelling their scent and basking in their beauty. Then it will be time to move on to the next happiness.
